"These Are The Things That Have Molded Us"

"I can feel your pain,
I can feel your struggle
You just want to live
But everything's so low,
That you can drown in the puddle
That's why I gotta hold us up
Yeah hold us up
For all the times no one ever spoke for us
So every single time that they play this song
You can say that, "that's what Bobby Ray wrote for us"
When his eyes get too high
And the sea up underneath get so deep
And you feel like you're just another person
Getting lost in the crowd?
Way up high in the nosebleeds (Uh)
Because we've both been there
Yeah both of us
But we still stand tall
With our shoulders up
And even though we always against the odds
These are the things that have molded us
And if life hadn't chosen us
Sometimes I wonder
Where I would have wound upCuz if it was up to me
I would make a new blueprint
Then build it from the ground up
Hey, but if its all for one
And One for all
Then maybe one day
We all could ball
Do it one time for the underdogs
From Bobby Ray to all of y'all

[Taylor Swift - Chorus]
I wish I was strong enough to lift not one but both us
Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one but both of us"

Both Of Us, B.O.B and Taylor Swift

Alright! I'm back for an official update, six weeks later.  Better late than never-right?!  Let's talk about the song lyrics above first!  Yes, my favorite person ever-Taylor Swift sings the chorus, and a rapper does the rest.  I chose the song because I feel like as a teacher down here, I'm fighting to teach the underdogs in the education system.  I'm fighting to give them a chance to be competitive when it comes to school and college one day when they go up against some of their counterparts that come from more highly ranked schools.  The lyrics I highlighted are most important to me because I feel like so many of these students are lost in the crowds among other students or even in the area sometimes.  As a teacher I want to be strong enough to lift them all up and help them, and as the year goes on, I'll get better and better at it!

Okay- onward!  Six weeks done with the school year!  Can we say "whew, good golly, wow!"  Six weeks of crazy, six weeks of good, six weeks of challenges, six weeks of fun, six weeks of bad, six weeks of stress, and six weeks of students learning from me.  Wow.  How do I feel, you may want to know?  I feel honored.  I feel tired.  I feel good.  I feel overwhelmed.  I feel frustrated.  I feel excited.  I feel like I'm making a difference some days.  I feel like I'm making no difference at all others.  I feel like I holler a lot.  I feel like I praise a lot.  I feel like I have no idea what I am doing some days.   But most importantly, I feel like I made the right choice, and that's what matters most.

Kindergarten is a whole new world for me, on top of how the school system is period down here.  I feel like I came into teaching with a pretty good educational background thanks to my well-deserved degree in elementary education, and thanks to the support from TFA, however-some days I feel like I have no clue what is going on.

Behavior is where I struggle the most, as does every other teacher at my school.  It is a learning process and a constant, revolving change of what works and what doesn't.  I'm learning and I have to say that I'm finally starting to see some better behavior with my students.  Because of this, we're really starting to be able to dive more into the actual content that should be taught to kindergarteners.  I now have them moving their own clips on their behavior chart and that really gets them frustrated.  It resonates a little more with them when they see that clip go down to a "bad" color.  I am really starting to be proud of them in the hallway- Friday they did better than a second grade class walking in the hall.  They saw the second grade class have to start standing in "kindergarten pose" just like my students do because they couldn't walk properly.  That made them feel good too, because I constantly tell them- "Let's look so good that we trick people into thinking we are first graders!"  That day they did AWESOME.

As far as learning content goes- I have a couple of students I'm really going to have to figure out what I need to do with them.  They are really struggling with even writing letters and that is just not helping them to get ahead in my class.  We are getting better at centers and students are learning that if they can't handle working in centers they are going to be removed and have to do worksheets. (They HATE that)

Today I had my Professional Saturday at Delta State with Teach For America.  It actually was ten times more beneficial than the last one.  I got several ideas to use for centers and to teach writing in the coming weeks which are two things I desperately needed to work on.  Centers are a huge thing at my school, so I know it should really benefit my students, myself, and my principal will probably really like it.  Several of the centers are easy to differentiate with different learning levels which is huge at my school too.

Last big thing!  I waqs observed by my MTLD for the first official time.  Originally he was going to come in the morning and observe, and then it got changed to the afternoon, after recess, lunch and PE.  (if you know anything about working with little kids, or any kids for that matter- they are soooooo much more productive and well-behaved in the mornings) soooooo I was a little nervous for the observation to take place that late in the day, but also knew it would probably be more beneficial for me as a teacher in getting feedback.  Guess what?  My students did AWESOME.  Everyone participated and raised hands, and TRIED.  I did have to have a few students move clips and one child in particular got really upset about having to move his clip down.  My MTLD happened to overhear another student tell him, "It's okay, you can get your clip back up if you try!"  I tell me students daily that if they make bad choices their clips will go down.  If they made good choices, their clips will go up, or can move back up if they have previously gone down.  To have him tell me he heard a student say that to another classmate just rings in the fact that they are beginning to understand that choices, whether they are right or wrong effect how well you as an individual can do in life.  It made me so happy to hear that!

Afterwards I did have a meeting with my MTLD, as we review how observations went and things to improve upon, and just how we are feeling.  It was also my first official meet with him so I was asked a lot of questions about myself.  I expressed that becoming a principal one day was something I have often thought about.  He said that he would like to talk to me later on about possible positions with TFA because I already have the passion for what I want to do!  (that also was something that made me feel really good!)

So, aside from all the craziness and bad going on, there is a lot of good to compensate for it!

Oh, and we all thought I was done-guess what, I'm not.  (Once I get started, it just doesn't stop!)  On a side note- I LOVE working at the Country Club as well.  The people who come in are wonderful and the people I work with are wonderful!  It was definitely the right decision to make as far as a part-time job is concerned. 

I also am having a great time with the friends I have made down here and I'm really starting to become more familiar with the area which is also a huge upper when being in a new place =)  Jackie also came to visit the other week, which was great seeing a friendly face from home!  I also still really appreciate all the cards, calls, texts, everything that I am getting from you all.  Please know that I really am still more busy than I would have thought I would be once school started.  Last week alone, I had some form of meeting every day after school and didn't get home until somewhere between 7-8pm my time.  I am trying to get back to each of you, but if I don't, I GREATLY apologize.  Please know I love you all, and miss you greatly.  Without your support and constant understanding of what I'm going through, this sure would be much more of a challenge.

Okay, I think I have said MORE THAN ENOUGH.  Next time, I'll try to add some pictures.  I love you all =)