"Cause Somewhere, Somebody Needs A Reason To Believe"- Britt Nicole

Before I get started, please take a moment to listen to the song above and read the lyrics on the screen.  I usually post lyrics to a song that have something to do with my life and Teach For America at the moment.  This song in particular has really stood out this week.  The lyrics fit my life at the moment, and what I'm going through.  =) Thanks!

Now that you've done that- let me begin!  So- SUPER sorry about having NO posts since last week!  Believe me, I have a TON to share, but I literally have barely had a minute of downtime.  I'm not someone who gets homesick or tends to have any problems with anyone, but I have to say this week I and everyone else at Institute have pretty much hit a bottom.  NOTTTT in a bad way, just in a way where you realize how much you do miss your free time, families, friends, pets, and even sleep, and not that you just miss them, that there really isn't a second to hardly talk to them...which sure makes a difference when you're running on an average of very few hours of sleep (IE 2-3hrs some nights) and germs from a million kids...  Yes, I and half of the people here have horrible coughs, colds, or stomach bugs.  Lucky for me I just have the disgusting sounding cough...  I think it's getting better though! Yay!

Anyhow- Before I get started on my life, a HUGE thank you goes out to anyone who takes time to read these posts, but mostly to my parents for being my biggest fans, along with my Nana, Grandparents, and Jubee.  All of you, even when I can't respond have sent me messages, emails, voicemails, comments, and it means more than you know.  Mom and Dad,  I know you'll see this and I want you to know that I love you and love you for everything you're doing for me right now.  This whole thing I'm doing wouldn't be possible without you. =)  To each of my friends... thanks for sticking around!  I miss our random get-togethers, talks, and anything else, but thanks more for the little texts or voicemails of encouragement even when I can't return them.  (Believe me, they brighten my day EVERY time.)

Okay!  Onward with the real-life stuff happening! Obviously, I'M BUSY!  hahaha...in case you haven't noticed yet.  The first week with students was a little rough.  I have to say I underestimated a kindergartner for sure and was honestly a little scared for when I would be on my own in August.  I discovered I wasn't the only one feeling that way... which helps.  We all made it to the weekend. (Heavenly feeling!)  Friday night we all hung around the dorm and didn't really do anything but sit around, talk, play a card game then go hang out outside with the mosquitos.  Megan and James decided to climb a tree, so of course there are pictures of that.  Last Saturday we went to Lake Granada for the day which is like a little mini beach in Granada, Mississippi.  It was absolutely wonderful to see sand, sun, water, and of course a blistering heat.  The water was beyondddddd warm, almost hot!  Even so, it couldn't be beaten.  It was a nice break from the reality to hit again on Monday.  Granada is about an hour and some minutes outside of Cleveland.  An hour down here is comparable to a 20 minute drive in NC.  Hahaha... my thoughts on time will definitely be different after living here. (Joe and Kathy- I see what it's like to be near NOTHING, though it makes the random adventures elsewhere that much more exciting.)  We all stopped and had Mexican for dinner, which was a lovely switch up from Dining Hall food.  We finished the night at Sonic on the way back to Delta State.  (Pictures will follow this post!)  Milkshakes are half-price after 8pm..we know how I like a good bargain =)

Sundays are filled with work all over again... so I and everyone else was back at it again!  Monday I had my first lesson again and it went SPLENDIDLY.  I truly needed that lesson too.  When I was feeling rough the week before all I could think was if I could just have one positive lesson, followed by a second I would know I was back in the groove and could do it.  It happened, and I feel that was God on my side.  I had a debriefing session, because once again I was observed and my CMA was just as excited as I was and told me how happy I should be.  I wanted to be, but I told her I had to have a second lesson the next day go just as well, so that I would know it was truly me getting a hold on this.  Sure enough, it happened, and the rest of the week went off on a good note.  I had my mind back in the right place and was feeling SOOOOOO much better than I had been.  Like the song above says "Don't let your fire burn out, somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe."  I needed it and I needed it for my students and I got it.  Luckily, this is the week I chose to get sick... so at least I haven't been hit with a horrible week of lessons and a cold together!  The lack of sleep is still pretty persistent... and the one hour bus rides are more often than not used for napping...  Like I said, I'm not the only one feeling it right now... though it seems to hit us all at different times.  My roommate Megan, and my friend Ian both had some pretty rough lessons this week and have all had their moments hit them too.  Ian's class in particular thought it would be funny that one kid would start singing "Amazing Grace."  When he walked to that side of the room, it started up again on the other side of the room.  Megan's students are throwing things and not paying attention...  They are both upper grades.  She has 7th grade math, he's doing 9th English Language Arts.  Just hearing these stories just proves to me how important it is I do this, and that I am doing what I've wanted to do- make a difference in someone's life. It starts in Kindergarten when kids learn how to act.  Now I share all these stories with you because we're all seeing the positives in this too.  If I can find them somehow, I will post some videos of the positive things I've watched happen in other TFA memeber's classes.  All three of us even had perfect (as close as you can get at least) Friday's.  Something is being changed in these kids... it's just hard to see it and takes times.  As tired and worn out as I am... I'm inspired.

On Friday, when we were finished with our kiddos, My CMA group had a celebration for making it through Week 2 with students.  We did Secret Teacher (like Secret Santa) with each other so that everyone would get a little pick-me up at the end of the week, and we had cake, chips, juice and our CMA leader showed us a video that I would love to post on here if I can get it of a previous TFA member who worked with the little ones.  It hit home when I watched it and got me a little teary-eyed.  (we all know how easily I cry! ahh.. a softy for sure.) We also had to design a chant to do when all the groups got back together before leaving to go back to campus.  OF COURSE my group was amazing, however some of the groups were just exceptional!  They had changed lyrics to songs and everything.  The whole meeting just helped the week end well.  I have a picture of my CMA group that will go up as well!

Now, I have finally made it to THIS weekend! (I'm sure I'll think of something I have left out...) (and this is super long... so sorry!! but I hope you're enjoying it!)  Yesterday (Friday) was my friend Ian's birthday, so a big group of us went out to Mexican for dinner to celebrate as well as dancing and then back home.  It was a lot of fun.  Today we all got up and went back to Lake Granada for the afternoon.  Just as lovely again, if not better!  The weather was a little cooler so the water was actually really nice too!  It was also not nearly as crowded.  We ate at this restaurant (now get ready for this, because I was ecstatic...) called-  "333 Restaurant"  Yes!  How exciting is it that the restaurant had my FAVORITE number!  The lake is also off of Route 333!!  Anyhow, a lot of us got crawfish and split it.  Most of us had not had it before, but it's one of those things we all knew we had to try at some point.  They were pretty good, definitely a lot of work.... and a little creepy seeing as it's the whole body, head and all!  (there will be a picture at the bottom!)  Now, I'm just home typing this!

I'm gonna post the pictures now!  Thanks again to everyone who reads this and is sending me good thoughts and prayers... it means a lot!  And please know that I am getting your emails and messages and calls and would love to keep getting them.  I try to reply when I can, and I know it seems silly like surely there should be SOME minute to do so... but I truly am bombarded right now... so bear with me!  I LOVE YOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  =)

These are out of order, so I'll label them!

My CM group, all 16 of us, plus one incredible CMA

Lake Granada!  (aka beach away from home)

Another view!  It's very large!

Random picture we didn't know about..

Megan (my roommate and I)  She has also become a very dear friend in all of this! =)

What goes around comes around in the form of attractive pictures.

My friend Ian and I (also has become a very great friend!)

Laying out! 

Some more pictures of us laying out!  

Again? haha  (This and the ones above are all from our first weekend when it was blistering hot!)

Stopping by Sonic for dessert.  Tee and Patrick!

Me, Ian, Megan

Random... but I eat a salad like this every night, if not 2 of them.

Lesson planning, again.  Story of all of our lives.

Whip Cream in the face for Ian's birthday!  James (on the right) seems to be getting a kick out of it!  The waiter looks a bit confused!

We ate outside at the Restaurant 333, and they had a sign on their outdoor stage!

One of the Route 333 signs!

Our dinner, the Crawfish, potatoes, and corn (The Restaurant 333 pictures are from dinner today, 6/30)

James and Megan climbed the tree..  James is in action! (This was last Friday, after Week 1)

Ian and I for a birthday picture!  We all had birthday hats to wear!  Some little girl at some other table wished him a happy birthday, and he gave her a hat.  The little girl could not have expressed more excitedness or happiness if she wanted to.  Her night was made!  This was last night, 6/29

Megan climbing the tree, last Friday.  This was her idea, and she got up there way before James!

Still going!

James still working on it!

Yay!

"Should I stay or should I go now"

The tree they were going to climb! Successfully accomplished as well!

Thursday, You're Really Here?

"Cause when push comes to shove

You taste what you're made of

You might bend, till you break

Cause its all you can take

On your knees you look up

Decide you've had enough

You get mad you get strong

Wipe your hands shake it off

Then you Stand, Then you stand

Life's like a novel

With the end ripped out

The edge of a canyon

With only one way down

Take what you're given before its gone

Start holding on, keep holding on"

-Rascal Flatts, Stand

Let me start by saying that I thought I was tired last week, boy I was kidding myself!  THIS week is beyond exhausting.  When they say it's like Teacher Bootcamp, it is no joke.  Let me preface this by saying I'm still beyond glad I'm doing this and before you read on, in case you're wondering, I'm just tired, worn out, and excited for the weekend to role around again.  I still love that I'm doing this, and still have no regrets! =)

Last Friday was the first day with students, but all they did was testing so none of us actually had time to see/meet/do anything with our students.  The first official day was Monday.  I was the only person teaching a real lesson from my Collab (group of four TFA people teaching the same kids, that I'll be teaching with all summer.)  The lesson actually began first thing in the morning, BEFORE Academic Intervention Hour, where we teach the rules and the whatnot to our students.  Let me tell you- I HIGHLY underestimated the power of a 4-5year old.  (These students are all kids who are entering kindergarten, none that have been in a school setting before and even learned the basic rules of behavior.)  Throughout the summer our leader has to watch us twice a week- one 30 minute session, and one 10-minute session, as well as random pop-ins from whoever, whenever.  My first observation, 30 minute observation was Monday, of course, during the lesson I taught before behavior lessons took place.  There was obviously some leniency given when observing for that mere fact, and behavior was not going to be counted against me.  I however, felt like I butchered the lesson, and was just happy to get through it. I did have my debriefing with my CMA (my head "teacher" that watches me and whatnot) not long after and she asked me how I felt.  Having been in a classroom before, I didn't feel so good about it at all as I was constantly calling them out.  She ended up saying that my lesson was wonderful, and my perseverance was impressive because its hard to stick it out a whole lesson with kindergartners that haven't had behavior taught to them yet.  I personally felt, and shared with her that it bothered me more, because I had been through school to teach unlike so many of these other people.  She reassured me I would be fine, and there would be a difference after rules were set in place.

I have to say, things have gotten better, but heaven help and bless anyone who deals with Pre-K, and Kindergarten.  It is highly underrated as a hard age to work with.  I'm just glad I'm getting the opportunity to work with them this summer before I'm in my own kindergarten class on Monday.  We have had several criers in the morning, and I've given over the fact that having personal space is gone when you work with little kids.  hahahaha...I've never had more hugs, tears, kisses, hands held, and even my butt tapped because they need my attention.  They are adorable though, and that makes it worth it, even if I am running on VERY little sleep.  

Tuesday, the second day we had Community Day.  All day was summer school, like normal.  I got up at 4:45am, got on a bus after getting breakfast and lunch and showering and on the bus by 5:55am, and made it to school by 7:15am.  From there, summer school lasts until about 1:00pm, when the students go home.  On a normal day, we have sessions at the school, and leave to come home at 4:30pm, putting us back on campus somewhere between 5:30-6:00pm.  This particular day we stayed at the school all day.  Community Day is when the parents and students are allowed to come meet all of us and have dinner with us.  The event lasted from 6-8pm.  The community day was wonderful, and we did get to meet several parents, which was GREAT.  However we didn't end up getting home until a little after 9pm.  Talk about a long day... and having to come home and do lesson plans all night, and be up again at 4:45am.... draining.  One thing that was really interesting was that at this dinner, the school officials and parents and everyone had a prayer before we ate.  It's so hard to imagine ever seeing that in a school in North Carolina, and it was nice to witness.  I know church is a big deal down here, and highly recognized, but I didn't know it was still so prevalent in the schools.  A lady from a local church even stopped in and had made goody-bags for all of the TFA staff.  I definitely felt welcomed at the school that night.  Oh- and I took a picture of the sun set on the way back, not because it's a great picture-it's not, but because it was funny that I have one of the sun rising, and now setting, because that's how long our days are.  It was actually very pretty, I just can't get good pictures through a bus window.

Moving on though- Today was a half-day, which is fantastic, and the only reason I have time to update right now.  We got back about 2:30pm, and then of course a fire alarm was going off in the dorm so we couldn't go inside for a while.  I'm headed to dinner soon, then off to do some more lesson plans.  I'm attaching a few more pictures to the bottom of this of random stuff.

When I say we don't sleep much- we don't sleep much.  There are nights when you really get like 3.5hours of sleep.  Good thing we have an hour+ bus ride there and back.  We're all making use of that time for naps!  In lite of the moment, these sleep-deprived days do lead to some prime picture moments.  Of course I try to capture them whenever I can.  Below I have a picture of a worksheet I made copies of, only to find out after the copy room closed that they didn't copy correctly... yay, a picture of the room we meet with our CMA in.  (She is absolutely wonderful!)  She constantly gives us amazing feedback, asks how we are doing, has a ton of patience to explain everything, and even supplies us with constant coffee, snacks, and bought us a cake to eat after our first day of teaching.  She truly does love what she does, and it shows, and means a lot.  Anyhow- there is a picture of the sign she made us, as well as the cake on the table in the right.  It's super small, but was so nice!  The next picture is down in our lounge, about 1:30am.  There are also people with computers, papers, and everything surrounding all the walls that I couldn't fit in there.  That is just how many people are up all hours of the night getting stuff done.  That is also only one of the lounges in my whole dorm.  The next few pictures are of the sun setting before we even made it home, and the last few pictures are during lesson planning sessions.  Megan-my roommate was so excited to be done and go to bed a little earlier, and was so tired and loopy, bless her heart that she really just sat on the floor.  All of her papers fell on top of her.  It was a very funny moment.  Ian was still awake writing a plan, but was also caught falling asleep during work time.  Enjoy.

I now have to go eat and get started again.  I'm aiming for a no later than midnight bedtime tonight, along with the fact that tomorrow is FRIDAY!!!!!!

Seeing the People, Seeing the Places

"I'm not looking back

But I want to look around me now

(Time stand still)

See more of the people and the places that surround me now

Freeze this moment a little bit longer

Make each sensation a little bit stronger

Experience slips away"

-Rush, Time Stand Still

Hello! I'm back!  Like always, the last two days were EXTREMELY long and tiring, but wonderful Yesterday we got to meet our students for the first time that we will be teaching this summer! The day consisted of nothing but testing so I we didn't get to spend a ton of time with our actual class and instead were helping with every grade level to get the reading part of testing completely done.  Monday we will be testing on math, however it won't take nearly as long so we will be starting some lessons-I'm teaching one of those lessons!  We'll see how that goes!  I have to teach the first lesson of the day, right after testing, and before we even have a chance to work with them on class rules and behavior.  It has the potential to be a bit of a crazy lesson, though I'm still excited!  That's what I'm here for!

Last night Delta State University hosted a Catfish on the Quad dinner in honor of Teach For America for us.  It was all free food and drinks, which was SUPER nice as everything was unlimited! Grandma- You'll be glad to know I have an official picture with the Fighting Okra.  He made an appearance at the event and so naturally I proceeded to run towards him to get a picture! =)

I have some pictures I'll be putting up below here, as well as the sunrise pictures I forgot!

The Video of the sunrising I accidentally took. (The water is overflow water from the huge storm we had the night before.)

All of the books I was going through to write a lesson. Basically I had no bed!

Pictures of the classroom I and 3 other girls will be teaching Kindergarten summer school in.

My house is up for rent... Fingers crossed that it rents soon! 

My roommate Megan! (We're at the Catfish on the Quad event, Friday night)

Our friend Ian!

Last, but not least- The Fighting Okra!

Jake, Megan, Me, Okra, Kristin, Ian, Patrick

Is It Really Friday?!

"It's Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday, everybody's looking forward to the weekend, weekend!"

-Rebekah Black

All I can say is hallelujah!  It's Friday.  Just finished about a million things again. Done with sessions, group work, and another lesson plan, and it's midnight.  Gotta be up again in the morning... but at least tomorrow is Friday.  Of course I will be sleeping and NOT having to do any work... though I should probably.

Okay, so short post- goodnight. 

The Hour Long Bus Ride

"We're the generation, we can't afford to wait, the future started yesterday and we're already late.... ....If you're ready we can save the world, believe again, start to mend, we don't have to wait for destiny, we should be the change we want to see." 

-John Legend, If You're Out There 

 First- tonight is going to be a long night, good thing I at least have something as nice as this to see in the morning: (this was meant to be a picture, but I accidentally filmed it!) 

 Just kidding- I can't load it from my phone.. I'll load it some other time. (it was going to be the sun rising.) 

 Anyhow, today we worked on learning/writing TFAs version of a lesson plan. I'm getting it now, however- after years of learning UNCG's version, it was slightly frustrating. 

 We practiced how we will be testing kids, starting Friday. The results will help us know where to begin with them in reading and what level they currently read at. We worked on how we will decorate and a multitude of other things we will do in the classroom for the next 5 weeks. I had no idea they would have us doing that much.. But we are! 

 I still have a lesson plan to work on, another session tonight, dinner, and I would really love to work a shower in somewhere in there. (no worries, I'm perfectly clean, I just don't want to get up any earlier than necessary in the morning!) 

 Also- Joe and Kathy- since you're reading this: I am definitely not becoming a vegetarian as I still really love burgers and chicken and the whatnot but I have actually had more of the vegetarian meals do far (especially at lunch) than some of the other food! 

 I'll get that video of the sun up soon. It's the most positive thing I have getting up that early to look forward to! I also really miss my dog, I sure can't wait to give him a big hug and take him running when I'm finally home again! He currently has a huge picture up as my desktop picture so I can at least see him there! 

 Alright- time to sit here until we get back! Love ya!

College in Speed Mode

Goin' places that I've never been.

Seein' things that I may never see again

-Willie Nelson, On The Road Again

Okay, pictures are up, I'm exhausted, and two days of Institute are done.  I'm feeling good for the most part though!  This is my first official moment to myself, all work obligations done.

To give you a run-down of my day, we are all split into groups that go to different sites.  My particular site has to be up, dressed, fed, and on a bus at 5:55am. Again-EARLY!  The days are long, filled with lots of sessions, TONS of information, and learning content at a super-fast speed.  I feel like I'm pretty well-acustomed to educational classes, long classes, and little sleep from college, and these all feel the same, just at a faster pace.  The bus ride to my site alone is over an hour long, one way!  We were driven through one part of the community and it was really disheartening.  I've known there would be a level of poverty, but I was not expecting it to the level of extreme that I saw.  Houses were missing doors, windows, falling in, had water below them, tons upon tons of beer bottle broken and thrown everywhere.. As sad as it was, I was at that point more inspired than I had been the whole time to do this.  I'm ready to make a change, help close the achievement gap, and help these kids know there is more to life, and a path to higher knowledge so they choose to have it.

We did have an Opening Ceremony for Institute Monday night as well, in the midst of a huge thunderstorm!  We all used trashbags as ponchos to run from the cafeteria to our dorms, dry off, then cross a mini flooded road to get to the auditorium!  It was actually kind of fun!

Tuesday (today) started out with a bang as well, but once again-I'm tired! Time to get to bed!  I'll write more soon! (Sorry to cut this short!)

-Love from the Delta!

Pictures!

Okay- long overdue pictures.  From the top-down- pictures of some boat in the Mississippi River, a theatre in downtown Helena. (It actually still has the window that was used back when segregation was a big deal.) Next- a Blues band playing.... followed by a very blurry pic of what was actually the campus flooding last night before our Opening Ceremonies.  The water was up past our ankles so we were all walking in dress clothes with our shoes off through the flood into the auditorium. Good times.  Lasttttt- I have two videos of chants taking place before the ceremony began.  All the regions have their own chants and chant them back and forth and what you here is us, the Delta Corps chanting.  We're 300+ strong, so it overpowers all of the other regions!